So, I’m sitting here, pondering the many mysteries of boxing, and good old Eddie Hearn – you know, the British dude who’s always sharply dressed and seems to be everywhere – he’s going on about this upcoming bout. Jaron ‘Boots’ Ennis, apparently a giant in the welterweight world (didn’t know giants made it in boxing, but there you have it), is going toe-to-toe with Eimantas Stanionis. There’s a buzz in the air, like when you open a soda can and it fizzes just a bit too much. Pretty sure that’s Hearn’s excitement radiating to everyone.
First off, there’s the whole thing about not having to worry about a secondary weigh-in. I mean, I’d be relieved too if I didn’t have to measure every sip of water or morsel of food. Ennis must be like, “Heck, I can actually eat like a normal person today.” Side note, whenever someone mentions a weigh-in, I imagine this massive scale where someone reads numbers aloud in a serious voice. But then I get distracted by the fact that whether it’s 8 a.m. or 10 a.m., those numbers are just as annoying. But that’s probably just me.
Hearn’s hoping Ennis doesn’t repeat his last show – which he calls “lackluster.” He did this in Philly against some guy named Karen Chukhadzhian and, no offense to Karen, but if I can’t pronounce your name after three tries, you’re probably not that famous. So yeah, Hearn’s banking on this fight living up to the hype. He literally used the phrase “fight of the year” which feels bold, but then again, he’s got that promoter energy, doesn’t he?
Now, the big talk is about the Ring Magazine belt. Apparently, only legends like Sugar Ray Leonard and Floyd Mayweather Jr. have clutched that prize. Picturing Ennis trying to fit into those shoes – feels like making a size ten foot fit into a nine. Not saying he can’t do it, but let’s just say he better have some fancy footwork, metaphorically speaking.
Hearn also rambled about how Ennis looked calmer and sleeker this week. But, funnily enough, I saw this clip online of Ennis, and yep, he seemed about the same drained vampire he’d looked in the prep for his last fight.
Then, there’s this whole speculation about him gaining crazy weight after the weigh-in, ’cause, let’s face it, if someone said “Eat whatever,” you’d go for an extra slice or two of pizza. But the word on the street is that he’s got a solid team making sure he doesn’t turn into a sluggish bear in the ring.
Lastly, there’s Hearn going on about Ennis needing his beauty sleep and a decent meal. Imagine needing someone to remind you of that just before a big ol’ fight. But it’s exactly like telling a toddler to calm down before bedtime, except it’s a grown man about to punch someone’s lights out.
In the end, who knows how it’ll turn out. I guess that’s the thrill of it. Tune in, they say. It might be epic… or maybe not. Who knows.
